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your whole life's in the
hand of god

cosmicotton:

heyitspj:

the girls in madoka magica die in breast size order largest to smallest

survival of the flattest 

hewasnumberwan:

Why is this the type of humor I enjoy

klavierr:
“ illbebachinaminuet:
“ a-horn-in-f:
“calmly???????????
”
My life rn
”
rip
”

klavierr:

illbebachinaminuet:

a-horn-in-f:

calmly???????????

My life rn

rip

honeysuckle-princess:
“this is the 2016 apology post. reblog in 45 seconds and 2016 will apologize to you in the form of money.
”

honeysuckle-princess:

this is the 2016 apology post. reblog in 45 seconds and 2016 will apologize to you in the form of money.

swiftembers:

How could I ask for more? Lifetime of laughter at the expense of the death of a bachelor..

50starsand13bars:
“ hokutens-and-assassins:
“ PLEASE READ AND REBLOG!!!!!
Put your car keys beside your bed at night.
Tell your spouse, your children, your neighbors, your parents, your Dr’s office, the check-out girl at the market, everyone you run...

50starsand13bars:

hokutens-and-assassins:

PLEASE READ AND REBLOG!!!!!


Put your car keys beside your bed at night.

Tell your spouse, your children, your neighbors, your parents, your Dr’s office, the check-out girl at the market, everyone you run across. Put your car keys beside your bed at night.

If you hear a noise outside your home or someone trying to get in your house, just press the panic button for your car. The alarm will be set off, and the horn will continue to sound until either you turn it off or the car battery dies.

This tip came from a neighborhood watch coordinator. Next time you come home for the night and you start to put your keys away, think of this: It’s a security alarm system that you probably already have and requires no installation. Test it. It will go off from most everywhere inside your house and will keep honking until your battery runs down or until you reset it with the button on the key fob chain. It works if you park in your driveway or garage.

If your car alarm goes off when someone is trying to break into your house, odds are the burglar/rapist won’t stick around. After a few seconds, all the neighbors will be looking out their windows to see who is out there and sure enough the criminal won’t want that. And remember to carry your keys while walking to your car in a parking lot. The alarm can work the same way there. This is something that should really be shared with everyone. Maybe it could save a life or a sexual abuse crime.

I don’t care what your blog theme is, this can save someone’s life and needs to be spread

passthecocaine:
“ the-hobbit-hair:
“ passthecocaine:
“ Excuse me but what is this doing in the potato tag
that does not look like a fucking potato to me
”
why were you in the potato tag
” ”

passthecocaine:

the-hobbit-hair:

passthecocaine:

Excuse me but what is this doing in the potato tag

that does not look like a fucking potato to me

why were you in the potato tag

image

foxyplaydate:
“ killer-pineapples:
“ kittendesu:
“ the-cell-block-tango:
“ astronomyproblems:
“ Idk if this counts as a peeve more of an art-astronomy pet peeve
but when people draw the cresent moon and where the dark, shaddowed part of the moon is...

foxyplaydate:

killer-pineapples:

kittendesu:

the-cell-block-tango:

astronomyproblems:

Idk if this counts as a peeve more of an art-astronomy pet peeve

but when people draw the cresent moon and where the dark, shaddowed part of the moon is they put in stars

like studdenly that part of the moon is invisible instead of just being in the shadow

like wtf

wait no peOPLE ACTUALLY DO THIS???

 really stupid question though but like, aren’t there stars in front of the moon??? like??? space isn’t two dimensional so someone putting a couple stars in front of the shadow wouldn’t necessarily be wrong?? because aren’t there stars all around in space and?????? im just going to be confused forever frick uvu; 

hun if there was a star infront of the moon we’d be fucking dead

i’m fucking crying

gamma-the-penguin:

needlekind:

needlekind:

needlekind:

WE WENT BOWLING AFTER DINNER FOR MY BIRTHDAY AND THERE WERE LIKE FORTY FURRIES THERE DOING, LIKE, SOMETHING OR ANOTHER I DON’T EVEN KNOW BUT THEY WERE BOWLING IN THEIR FURSUITS AND DOING VERY WELL ACTUALLY?????

they did a big group shot and invited me over to take pictures because i had taken selfies with a ton of them and then fuckin jess told them it was my birthday and they inviTED ME INTO THE GROUP SHOT AND LONG STORY SHORT HERE’S A PICTURE OF ME, PRINCESS OF THE FURRIES

image

so after posting this i found out that this is a thing that occurs monthly at this particular bowling alley because since this post BLEW RIGHT THE HELL UP and a few people found me and invited me to come back sometime?!?! this month’s furbowl (those are things, they’re called furbowls) happened to be last saturday and i was working a 12-hour closing shift that day but i showed up at the end of the night while they were already in the middle of the big group shot outside and they were about to disperse but i sprinted over asking them to hold still for just another second so i could get a picture and one of them screamed “YOU CAME BACK!!!!!!!” and, long story short, my reign continues supreme

image

(one of them owned that school bus; it had duct tape over the letters so it could be the “cool bus” and they called it the “waggin’ wagon”)

This story keeps getting better and better

kingkitsu:

smoothierox:

ifollowbadblogs:

“you’re an adult now”

image

“you need to choose a career”

image

“you need to make your own doctor’s appointment”

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